Reinventing Masculinity Will Allow Men to Live Longer Happier Lives | Ed Frauenheim

Podcast

Apr 21

Ed Frauenheim is a consultant and co-author of four books, including A Great Place to Work For All and Reinventing Masculinity: The Liberating Power of Compassion and Connection.

Ed and Traci share how old-school masculinity has harmed both of their lives. Ed gives concrete instructions on what all of us can do today to begin to reinvent masculinity.

Episode Timeline

[00:09] Intro
[0:58] Meet Ed
[4:16] Ed’s Heartbreaks
[8:25] Liberating masculinity from “bad guy branding”
[11:55] Expressing feelings instead of getting violent
[16:45] Men’s earliest friendships
[23:03] Why men don’t listen
[28:34] Men as unconscious ATM machines
[39:47] Attachment wounds in marriage
[45:50] Underneath men’s anger is a broken heart
[47:40] Closing
[49:35] Outro

Resources Mentioned

Reinventing Masculinity (Book)

Standout Quotes

“I've had my own heartbreaks, you might say, or a lot of sadness and struggle and shame around not fitting into the typical categories and not meeting the expectations of being a winner, a high-performing professional that rises to the top of an organization, a clutch sports performer, even a lady killer.” (Ed)
“...elevating how important it is to be compassionate and connected as men today.” (Ed)
“I'm interested in justice and liberation from confining roles that our society puts on all of us.” (Traci)
“It's borne out in the data that when men really adhere to those conventional beliefs very strictly, they don't live as long. They have worse health outcomes in general.” (Ed)
“The single biggest factor for health and a long, happy life is friendships.” (Ed)
“Men get this message at some point, especially in adolescence, that you’ve got to be the smartest guy in the room. And to be curious and ask questions is seen as weak, and we can't be weak. We smush out that curiosity.” (Ed)
“We've been told to be courageous and we are often courageous in the physical realm, in the financial realm, but not necessarily the realm of feelings.” (Ed)
“You can tell how hungry we are as men, as human beings for connection.” (Ed)